'Twas The Night Before Christmas...

When all through the house, 

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

When I was little we spent Christmas with my grandparents in Lubbock. We moved to Albuquerque when I was about three, and my parents always went ‘home’ for Christmas. Both sets of grandparents lived there so it worked out fine because we got to see everyone.

My dad’s mom, my grandmother, always said “Christmas Eve Gift” when we got there. Sometimes it was in the middle of the night but if it was Christmas Eve, that’s what she said in greeting, as soon as we walked through the door.

I never knew what it meant. I thought it was just one of those weird Grandmother things that she did and said. Later, when Grandmother and Granddaddy were no longer around to celebrate Christmas with, we still said it. It didn’t matter if we were at my house, my mom’s or my brother’s, that was the first thing said when someone arrived. It was kind of a joke to Grandmother I guess.

One year, on a knitting list I’m a part of, one of the ladies posted about Christmas Eve Gift. I was surprised! All this time I thought it was just something in our family, so I checked it out on the Internet. (I really don’t know what people did before the Internet. That’s my main source of information!) Anyway, I found out there is a custom, more often than not dealing with gifts, centered on the saying, “Christmas Eve Gift.”

I still remember Grandmother, happy to see us, saying Christmas Eve Gift. I remember walking through the garage, to the back door, and the smell of her house as we came in from the long trip. I remember her having the beds ready, pallets on the floor for us kids, and the warmth and comfort that was offered.

We don’t give or get an extra gift for being the first to say Christmas Eve Gift in our family. I know now what the gift was, as we came through the door and she called out, “Christmas Eve Gift” and we said it back. It’s the gift of being with those you love. It’s the gift of family, together at Christmas.

Remember, the things you get and give this year, the material things, are just that; things. And they will soon be forgotten. The best gift of Christmas is the gift of yourself, spending time with those who mean the most. That’s the gift that will be cherished and remembered, for the rest of time.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, 

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there...

I found this poem, written by Howard Epstein. I adapted it...just a little, just for fun. Enjoy!

A Knitter’s Christmas 

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, 

 Knitting needles were clicking, by way of my spouse, 

Knit one, purl one, and yarn over too, 

Her fingers were flying, so much left to do, 

A ski hat for Ty, a warm scarf for Jen, 

A sweater for Bryce, He’ll start a new trend! 

A silk shawl for Judi, some argyles for Dad, 

A knit toy for Caleb, that loquacious lad,

I watch her with wonder, as objects appear, 

Some flowers, a castle, a river, a deer, 

An edging, a ruffle, are done in a whiz, 

She’s painting with yarn, like the artist she is, 

Her patterns are perfect, there’s never a glitch, 

And I know she is knitting, a kiss in each stitch, 

I think that all knitters, who labor away, 

Giving joy unto others, must feel good every day, 

Her needles stop clicking, nothing more left to do, 

So I sit down and say, “Merry Christmas to you” 

And to all who are knitters, may I say with delight, 

“Merry Christmas To All, And To All A Good Night!” 

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight, 

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

Fruitcake

What you making? Fruitcake! 

What you baking? Fruitcake! 

Candied cherries, red dye number two, 

Green cherries? Green ones too! 

It’s fruitcake! It’s fruitcake! 

Fruitcake. The very word conjures up a variety of images. There’s that crazy person in the office down the hall. There’s the guy on the corner who barks when you go by because he thinks he’s a dog. And there’s the heavy, neon colored fruit embedded, full of nuts, rum soaked cake that one receives at Christmas.

Hear the Fruitcake song!

There are two distinct opinions when it comes to fruitcake: Those who like fruitcake, and those who loathe it. I happen to like fruitcake. If you don’t like fruitcake it’s probably because you’ve never tasted a good one.

My husband has a friend who gifts us with a fruitcake every year. It comes from Collin Street Bakery in Corsicana, Texas, and it’s wonderful! We get their world-famous DeLuxe® Fruitcake. They bake it from their original recipe, developed in 1896. It’s chock full of fruit and nuts and it’s just good!

Collin Street Bakery

Deluxe Fruitcake

Yummy!!!

There are lots of jokes about fruitcake. You can use it like a brick, for a doorstop. You can build your biceps by using it as a weight. You can put a ribbon on it and give it to your boss. You can use it for self defense. Or you can just eat it.

All this talk about fruitcake has made me hungry. Since we scarfed our fruitcake up (my husband likes it too), before the relatives come in so we didn’t have to share, it’s all gone. After thinking about it I remembered my grandmother and mother both used to make fruitcake. I was sure I had the family recipe so I started digging around and sure enough I found it. I’d like to share it with you.

The Ultimate Fruitcake Recipe 

You'll need the following:

• 1 cup butter 
• 1 cup sugar 
• 4 large eggs 
• 2 cups dried fruit (I used one carton of candied fruit) 
• 1 teaspoon baking soda 
• 1 teaspoon salt 
• 1 cup brown sugar 
• 1 teaspoon lemon juice 
• 4 cups nuts (pecans or walnuts) 
• 1 bottle of good quality rum 

NOTE: Rum may be replaced with your favorite beverage.

Directions: Sample the rum to check for quality.

Find a large bowl. Check the rum again. To ensure it is the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teacup of sugar and beat again.

Make sure the rum is still okay. Cry another tup. Turn off the mixer. Break two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the rum to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the rum. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find.

Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window, check the rum again and go to bed.

It sounds great! I’m trying it tonight. By the way, it's supposedly impossible to age a fruitcake too long. If it’s stored in an airtight container and basted occasionally with liquor, it'll keep indefinitely. Of course you’ll need to make sure it’s quality liquor before basting.

Pecans or walnuts, Citrus peel, lots of stuff, 

Add what you feel! 

Sticks of butter, cinnamon, Mo-molasses, lots of dark rum, 

Artificial color, artificial flavor, 

If your family don’t want it, 

Give it to a neighbor! 

It’s fruitcake! 

It’s fruitcake! 

My friend made a crocheted candy cane for my tree. Pretty, huh!

Here’s a picture of my cute miniature snowman tea set. Just the right size if you don’t like fruitcake!

 

 Fruit cake! Heavy as lead. 

Fruitcake!If it hits in the head! 

Fruit cake!It could kill you dead! 

It’s Fruitcake! 

Yeah, fruitcake!

This is the Day...

This is the day,  

That the Lord has made.  

I will rejoice and be glad in it ...   

I know you’ve heard before that kids say the darndest things. Well, my kids are no different. In fact, most times I thought they were extremely clever! (It’s possible there could be a bias involved!)

When we first moved to this small town in West Texas, it was a temporary move. That was almost 32 years ago. My daughter was born in the hospital here but the boys were born in a small town about 90 miles away. They weren't delivering babies here at that time and my doctor had moved so I followed him. When Bryce was born my doctor asked my husband how he did that. He meant how we had a boy as he had three girls. Or maybe he was talking about Bryce being born, uh, peeing!

My daughter talked at an early age. She spoke very clearly as well, which sometimes wasn’t a good thing! A doctor once asked me if she was vaccinated with a phonograph needle! Therefore, Bryce didn’t talk. Or maybe it was he didn’t have to (or get to) talk because she was busy enough for the both of them! He did communicate verbally eventually and has proceeded to voice his opinion and speak his mind ever since!

When we moved outside the ‘city’ limits, about three miles, we had some wonderful neighbors named Joyce and Kenneth. Kenneth was a big man, loud and even a bit intimidating if you didn’t know him. I would never have wanted to cross him but he was really a teddy bear inside, especially where the kids were concerned. Joyce is one of the most creative people I know. She’s a true artist and a genuinely sweet person, inside and out.

Kenneth was my husband’s best friend. He was really the age of my parents, so he could have been Alan’s dad, but it didn’t matter; they clicked, from the start. They were a big part of our lives for many years.

One day the kids and I were going somewhere. We used to sing silly songs, either with the radio or just on our own to pass the time. The kids were in the backseat, both strapped in. We sang several songs then they wanted to sing a song they learned at Sunday school. It was simple, and we started singing together. “This is the day, this is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it…” We kept singing when suddenly Bryce sang, “Rejoice… and Kenneth” in his little boy voice. It was incredibly sweet and hysterically funny!

Kenneth and Joyce moved to another house in town. The kids and I didn’t see them as much but Kenneth and Alan were still the best of friends. Kenneth passed away several years ago and there are still days that Alan is sad because he misses him so much. Mama Joyce lives in Midland now and we seldom see or hear from her. We need to make the time because we miss her too. In fact, one of the last times I saw her she was talking about Bryce’s sweet song, "Rejoice...and Kenneth!"

I will rejoice and be glad in it...

I got my present from my Secret Santa the other day. I was expecting it and when I looked inside it was a great surprise! She was generous and gave me yarn, notions, a book and candy! Here’s a picture.

I don’t know what I’ll make with the yarn yet, but I’ll come up with something! And speaking of yarn, I entered a contest and have won yarn THREE times! It's all from Sweden! It's very nice yarn and quite exciting (to me!)since my luck usually runs to the extreme opposite direction!

Looking forward to having the time off from work so I can relax and maybe get a little bit of what I want to do done.

This is the day,

I will rejoice and be glad in it…

Rikki Don’t Lose That Number

We hear you're leaving, that's OK.

I thought our little wild time had just begun. 

I guess you kind of scared yourself, you turn and run. 

But if you have a change of heart… 

When my daughter was small, like most little girls, she had a doll. This doll was a typical ‘baby’ with a cloth body, plastic head and limbs. The baby didn’t have hair but had paint symbolizing hair on the top of its head.
When she first got her doll she wanted to name it. We suggested a few things but she wasn’t interested. One day she proclaimed her doll’s name was Richard. And Richard was a girl.

Richard and Callye were always together.

First off, we didn’t know anyone named Richard at that time. I was a stay at home mom with her so I tried to think of a movie or television show that might have had someone named Richard as a character. Nothing came to mind. But she was adamant. Her doll’s name was Richard. And Richard was a girl.

Richard became part of the family. She had dresses and little booties to wear, but most of the time she was nude. She was very durable, too, as sometimes she was held by the leg or the arm and she still stayed in one piece. It was probably lucky that her features were permanent, or as permanent as paint can be. She had many adventures, some good, some not so good!

A doll like Richard. And it's a girl doll.

One morning as I was folding laundry, I had a movie playing in the background. There was a fight scene and the two men involved were yelling at each other and one said, “I’ll beat the hell out of you.” Richard and Callye were playing house in another part of the room and I glanced over to see if she’d heard. She was busy feeding Richard and had not even glanced at the television. Later that night as we were sitting together, Callye picked up Richard by the leg and started pounding her on the floor. I said, “What are you doing?” She calmly said, “I’m beating the hell out of Richard.” She’d heard.

Richard went everywhere with us. Well, almost everywhere. One Sunday, Alan was on a hunting trip and Callye and I were getting ready to go to Sunday school and church. We were dressed but Richard’s clothes were nowhere to be found. We searched high and low but alas, there was no outfit for Richard. Being the resourceful mother I am I suggested that Richard lay in mom’s bed while we were at church. It took a little negotiation but that’s what was finally decided, and Richard stayed home.

Years later, in the teacher’s lounge, a colleague, who had at one time been Callye’s Sunday school teacher, and I were visiting. We were talking about our kids and their old toys and I mentioned that Callye had loved a doll named Richard but Richard was a girl. She got a funny look on her face and said, “So that’s it!” I asked what she meant and she told me this story: One Sunday morning, a long time ago, Callye had gone to Sunday school. She told her two teachers that Richard couldn’t find any clothes and stayed at home in mom’s bed while daddy was gone.

I was mortified. We lived in a small town and you know how small towns are. She reassured me that she hadn’t thought anything bad, that Richard must be a cousin or something. Yeah, right!

Richard, who was a girl, was a part of Callye’s (and our) everyday life for a long time, but as it happens she eventually outgrew Richard. And I eventually lived down the story that quickly circulated through the school.

Richard isn’t lost. We still have her, packed away somewhere, probably without clothes, waiting to sleep in somebody’s bed! But she'll never be forgotten.

Rikki don't lose that number. 

You don't wanna call nobody else. 

Send it off in a letter to yourself...

Well, I had to tell my sister the shawl wasn’t going to be on time. I’ll finish but I can’t make the deadline. I haven’t had much time to work on it and it seems for every two inches I finish I take out three. I just need some down time and I can whip it out. So, in the meantime I decided on some instant gratification! I saw a scarf on a lady in Ruidoso, probably last year or maybe the year before. I really liked it but she was a stranger and I didn’t want to ask if I could look at it. I should have. I went home and sketched out what I thought it looked like. Then I got busy on other things and lost the paper and didn’t really think about it again.

Loops is a great yarn store in Tulsa, Oklahoma. My oldest boy used to live there so I got to visit occasionally. But he’s moved so I just get updates by email and Facebook as to what’s going on there. The other day I got a note about a simple, Neck’s Best Thing scarf. Voila! That was it! That was the Ruidoso scarf! Or at least it was close enough. They were even so kind as to give a FREE pattern! I love when that happens. And it’s a real pet peeve when something says it’s free only to be free if you BUY a bunch of yarn first. But I digress. Anyway, I had some bulky yarn I’d picked up for something or other so I took it out and gave the scarf a try. I used a size 19 needle and cast on 7 stitches. I liked it fairly well but something was missing. I took it to work, for an impartial opinion, and the verdict was, MORE FRINGE! So, that was easy enough to fix, and I did. It’s kind of cute, don’t you think?

The first try. Added more fringe.

It was fun and I liked getting something finished in a short amount of time so I couldn’t stop at one. But this time I thought I would change it up some.

Cast on 7 stitches

US 19, 15mm needles

I found some other yarns I had around and added them to the fringe. This one looks kind of Christmasy.

A little sparkle.

 These are fun and I am already thinking of some other variations.

Up close--yarn is Charisma by Loops and Threads

Fringe a little longer too.

Thank you Loops for sharing this fun pattern! If you’re interested in seeing other creative projects head over to Our Creative Spaces and look around!

The Christmas season brings back memories; Memories of people, places and things that are packed away, maybe not thought of often, but never forgotten.

Rikki don't lose that number,

It's the only one you own. 

You might use it if you feel better, 

When you get home...

Back in Black

I hit the sack. 

I've been too long I'm glad to be back. 

Yes, I'm let loose, 

From the noose, 

That's kept me hanging about... 

It’s the day after Thanksgiving, the ‘beginning’ of the Christmas shopping season. It’s called Black Friday and it’s a crazy day! It’s not really a holiday but most people who don’t work in the retail business have the day off. Everyone deserves the chance to participate in the shopping frenzy!

 The news is already full of stories of people who have their Thanksgivings dinners delivered or prepared in the parking lot of a business where they’ve taken temporary residence while waiting for the magic hour when the sales begin!

There was a time when I was an avid Black Friday shopper. The husband and I would head out early in the morning to whatever store we had chosen, hoping to snag a bargain. We’d get lucky sometimes and actually get what we went after. But we weren’t aggressive shoppers and agreed that if we scored it was good but if we had to get physical to negotiate the deal it wasn’t worth it. We’d finish up and go to IHop or Golden Corral for a great breakfast then head home for a nap. Most often we’d finish and be back at the house by 9:00 am.

I’m not sure whether it’s old age or just the trouble of getting out in the crowd, but there’s seldom a bargain strong enough to attract me now. I haven’t even looked at the ads to see what I’m missing! My daughter is planning to participate. My husband is even talking about it. Me? I’ll stay in with the littles. We’ll make pancakes and hang out in our pj’s til they all get back.

We tried these. They didn't turn out as pretty as hers but they were tasty!

I’m starting to listen to the tv and I’m hearing some tempting commercials. I do need a Christmas tree and I hear there’s one for half price. Then there’s that Crockpot, a fancy one, for just 16.98. And I could buy a sweater and get jeans free and……nah. That old Black Friday Magic almost worked. But not quite!

I've been looking at the sky 

'Cause it's gettin' me high.

Forget the hearse 'cause I never die.

I got nine lives,

Cat's eyes,

Abusin' every one of them and running wild...

Thanksgiving dinner was nice. As expected, it wasn’t finished on time, but that was an oven error on my part. We had too many baked dishes this year, and even with two ovens there wasn’t enough room. We added some new cuisine this year, just for a change. Two dishes I had actually made before but it’s been so long nobody remembered. Callye added fresh Brussels sprouts sautéed with bacon. I don’t really care for Brussels sprouts, but bacon makes anything palatable!

We cooked and cleaned all day and now there is some relaxing to be done! I’m working on a shawl for my sister to give to someone. It’s alpaca, purple, red and blue yarn, depending on how you look at it! I’m on a deadline so I have to get it finished and in the mail. I’m ready to hunker down with a good movie or two and knit on!

Surprise! There are some Black Friday specials…online! That kind of shopping I can do. Especially if there is yarn involved! I like shopping even more if I can knit at the same time!

Check Our Creative Spaces for lots of cool projects!

'Cause I'm back.

Well, I'm back 

Yes, I'm back 

Well, I'm back in black 

Yes, I'm back in black

Today I Don't Feel Like Doing Anything...

I just wanna lay in my bed.  

Don't feel like picking up my phone  

So leave a message at the tone. 

Cause today I swear I'm not doing anything… 

Well, not anything I don’t want to do. How about that? I’m tired! I’m not tired like a normal tired. I have no energy for anything. By the time I get home from work I could just go to bed. Add fixing supper, cleaning up after and other little chores and I’m exhausted. I’ll look at the computer for a bit, knit some if I’m lucky and go to bed. It’s as early as 10:00 pm on some nights. That’s not like me at all!

The past two or three weeks have been really busy. Lots of travel, a funeral and the everyday fun at work makes for long days. I decided to take all next week off. Of course I’ll spend most of it getting ready for Thanksgiving, but at least I can start and stop when I want. No 5:30 am for me for a whole week! One thing that irritates me though is that now Tuesday is an early release day. Those going to work get to leave at 1:30. So I take one of my comp days, worth 8.5 hours and I feel cheated. It should only count as a half day off. But work isn’t fair. And it never will be. I’d have to take the day anyway because I have to go to the doctor with my husband for one of those “turned 50” procedures. Life isn’t fair. And it never will be.

We had a trip planned for Thanksgiving, to the mountain house. It’s pretty there and there are actually ‘seasons’. It would be nice but it’s far. We’d have a great time and we’d put off coming back home as long as we could. It would lead to starting another week being tired. So we will stay home and have family over to enjoy the day. There’s a lot to be done to get ready for the holiday but I’m comforted in knowing I can do it, at my own pace, without having to report to anyone. I don’t even have to get out of my pajamas if I don’t want! I can have a glass of wine. I can knit a row or two. And what if I decide to take a nap in between? Heck, I might just do that!

No, I ain't gonna comb my hair 

Cause I ain't going anywhere 

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, oh… 

I have a bad habit of keeping things in the plastic store bags they were placed in when bought. And if I don’t already have them in a bag I tend to put them in a bag. So today, while rearranging some of these plastic bags I ran across a couple of projects that I finished knitting but never finished.

Remember to check out Our Creative Spaces to see some great projects!

They need the ends worked in and probably would benefit from blocking. But the knitting is done!

Montego Bay scarf

Couple of dishcloths.

Chianti shawl

Something with a ruffle...I forgot what it's called

I know there are more, some I’ve probably even forgotten doing, and I’ll find them…eventually. Then I’ll have a big blocking party. Who knows? If I got to it before Christmas I might even have some shopping done!

I'll be lounging on the couch, 

Just chillin' in my snuggie… 

I’ll be watching corny Christmas movies, knitting and relaxing. Because today, I just don’t feel like doing anything.

Yes I said it. 

I said itI said it cause I can. 

Today I don’t feel like doing anything...

Put Me In Coach

Oh, put me in, Coach - I`m ready to play today.  

Put me in, Coach - I`m ready to play today… 

As we traveled to the funeral, my mind was filled with an assortment of conflicting emotions. I looked forward to visiting with my relatives and seeing my mom and dad but my heart ached for the loss of my dear uncle and the sadness his immediate and extended family was feeling. It’s ironic how a funeral becomes a family reunion. The despair of losing a loved one is evident but at the same time memories of good times are revived.

My uncle was a great man. I knew it but it was reaffirmed today. He was born in 1926 and was my mother’s oldest brother. He grew up in a small town called Jayton, Texas and went to school there through the tenth grade. The family moved to Wolfforth, Texas, and he graduated from Frenship High School in 1944.

Sonny served in the U.S. Army, 101st Airborne, from 1944 to 1946. The interesting thing about that is my nephew is in the same division. They talked about it at the family reunion this summer. I thought it was cool and it made me proud.

U.S.Army, 101st Airborne. Hooah!

Wilford “Sonny” Arthur, influenced many in his life. He was a teacher and a coach. He began his coaching career in 1950 at Pettit, Texas. The population was about 100 people. Now, the town does not even appear on the state map and the 2000 population is unknown. He went on to Spade, Texas then back to his hometown, Jayton, Texas.

Pettit HS, Pettit, TX Photo courtesy Stephen Taylor

Sonny coached in Jayton from 1952 to 1967. Until the last three years of his time there he was the only coach. Finally, another coach was hired to help with the girl’s athletic program. During his career in Jayton he had forty-four straight wins in football. Five of those were trips to Regional, which at that time was as high as you could go. Besides the success in football he also had thirty-one straight wins in basketball with two trips to Regional. As coaches do, Sonny moved to another school to coach for six more years. At Ropesville, Texas, he added even more wins to his successful coaching career. Overall, he achieved a lifetime record of 73% wins in football and 69% in basketball. That’s by far better than the average bear!

Jayton Jay Birds

After coaching, Sonny began his career as a Superintendent of Schools in Quail, Texas. He stayed there for six years then moved to Lakeview, Texas and stayed there as Superintendent until his retirement in 1989.

Retirement didn’t mean stop working to Sonny. He took care of his ranch and was active in the community, especially as a fan of the Jayton Jaybirds athletics program. He and my aunt Ruth, were honored as Fans of the Year in 2008.

Perhaps one of the things Sonny was most proud of in his coaching career was his induction into the 6-man Coaches Hall of Fame. He is famous for his experience in this area. I remember once when I was at a training with a friend in Waco, that we went down to the hotel lounge to hang out a bit. It was when former Texas Tech coach, Spike Dykes, was inducted into the Texas Sports Hall of Fame. The room was filled with active and retired coaches. My friend had a brother who was also a coach and she knew some of the people there so we started visiting. I mentioned that my uncle was a coach, and said his name. The majority of the people in the room knew him! He was not only well known but highly regarded in the coaching circle.

http://www.texassixmancoachesassociation.com/

The church where the funeral was held was packed with people. One of his former students was asked to pay homage to Sonny. He asked how many in the congregation had been coached by Coach Arthur. An incredible number stood up. It was heartwarming to see how his influence affected these boys, old men now, so much that they came, years after high school, to pay respect to their ‘coach’. I can only hope that in my career in education I may impact one tenth of the people Coach Arthur inspired in his lifetime. I’ll forever hear him call me ‘hon’ and tell me I get prettier every year. Sonny, you’ll be missed.

 Well, beat the drum and hold the phone - the sun came out today!

We`re born again, there`s new grass on the field.

The only advantage to traveling long distances, to whatever event, and not driving, is that there is a lot of knitting time. I finished another cowl, just needing blocking, and think that I have found the never ending skein of sock yarn! It’s part of one cowl, a complete other cowl and there’s still some left.

One cowl, two cowl...

I had thought I’d finish it in the second cowl but if I had continued to knit until it was gone it would have been long enough for a giraffe’s neck! As it is, I stopped and I’ll figure out something to use it with.

It keeps going and going and going...

If you’ve not seen Our Creative Spaces, head on over! I missed this week’s deadline, with all that was going on, but there is plenty to see. Check it out!

Well, it was a great weekend and I’m ready to hit the week with a positive attitude. I’ll give it my best shot. It’s just a game and I’m ready to play.

Oh, put me in, Coach - I'm ready to play today.

Put me in, Coach - I'm ready to play today…

Time is on My Side

Time is on my side, yes it is.

Time is on my side, yes it is.

Time is on my side. Or so I thought! But it seems like no matter how hard I try, lately there is not enough time in my day to do all the things I want (and need) to do. Time isn’t waiting for me. It’s passing me by.

I stopped at the grocery store and I became my mother. Then my grandmother, and my mamaw. All of the prominent female influences in my life combined and took over my body and my mind. I find myself looking for the bargains and not buying something I want because it’s too expensive. Or maybe I will buy it and I’ll store the leftovers in the refrigerator and drag them out until there’s not enough for anyone to eat. I’ll find it later, forgotten and green, in a plastic container. Or I’ll look at cookbooks and magazines trying to find something new to try then I’ll get the stuff to make the same old thing I always make. When did I become like that?

I think about my daughter, my beautiful 30 year old daughter, and I wonder how it happened that she is already grown. She doesn’t know it, but she is me. She’s the mom with three little kids trying to juggle all the things she has to do and still find time for her. She’s the one who worries that her kids will do well in school or be liked by their peers. She’s the one who tries to please everyone and is disappointed because it seems she always misses the target. She’s the one who worries that she’s too fat, too gray, too old.

I think about my parents and wonder who they are, because they are little old people now, not the mom and dad I know. I worry about their health, their feelings, their welfare. I hope they remember to take the right medicine and call the doctor if needed. I worry that they will be lonely. I think back to when my grandparents were the old people, the old people we thought we’d never lose. But we did lose them and time still went on.

I think about my life and how my thoughts and opinions and actions have changed over the years. I’m not who I was but I’m not who I’ll be. I think about how fast the days pass now. My newborn baby grandson will be eight years old on his birthday. And I wonder where the time goes. I cherish his hugs and when he asks for me and just wants to be with me, because I’m his Mamye. And I know in a short while it will change. He’ll be busy. Then he’ll be the 30 year old. My daughter will be where I am now and I’ll be my mother.

Finally things will slow down. I’ll become my great grandmother who told me the weekends were the worst. She said she could find things to keep her busy during the week. She had phone calls and visits, her knitting and her soap operas to occupy her time. But Sunday she was usually alone. She would cook enough for two or three but nobody came to share her food. She would sit and wait for anyone to drop by but they never came. She said it was the longest and hardest day of the week.

A friend once told me I was on the downside of life. He said we (because we are the same age) are closer to the end then the beginning. That’s a sobering thought! Lately the notion of retiring has crossed my mind. Once I could never imagine not working. But now I count the days until the weekend, when I can do what I want to do, not what I have to do. The things I have to do get done, but at my own pace. Yes, time is on my side. I’m just not sure which side.

Now you always say

That you want to be free,

But you'll come running back.

You'll come running back.

You'll come running back to me…

How many scarves and shawls are too many for one person? I’ve probably reached the limit. But what happened this cold scarf weather morning when I was looking for just the right one to complement my fashionable ensemble? That’s right. There was none. I’m partial to variegated, as evidenced by the picture, so I have more options.

Still, nothing seemed to work. I could either not find a shirt to match a scarf or not find a scarf to match a shirt. Finally, after multiple wardrobe malfunctions, I found a combination that worked. And as I was searching I was planning more projects to supplement the gaps I noticed. It will only take a little time, right? And time, is on my side. Yes it is.

Well, time is on my side, yes it is.

Time is on my side, yes it is...